This Could Only Happen To Me

So I've sort of been cheating on Stupid Bowl '09. I'm not anxious to fight the elements this year and I bought an efficient little oil-filled radiator heater. I've had my heat on, but just so my plumbing doesn't freeze. I've had it pegged at 50 degrees. It's kicked on exactly two times so far this year. Last night, it gets down to like twenty degrees, maybe in the high teens.

My alarm goes off at 6:35am. It's bad enough waking up after a four-day turkey filled weekend. But I start to situp and realize it's too cold to move. I strongly reconsider going back to sleep until 8. By about 6:42, I've talked myself into getting up. It's freezing in my place. I stumble out of my bedroom and around the corner to the living room.

There, my front door stands cracked open by about 8 inches. I can see that it's snowing outside and we're just past dawn. Wonderful. My creaky vocal cords muster up a "What the fuck?" and I go slam the door shut. It's still locked, but apparently, a pressure change or strong gust of wind popped it open when I didn't get it fully shut after taking the trash out around 9:30 last night.

So I check the thermostat. The setting lever goes down to 50 degrees, but the temperature indicator only goes down to 50 too. So my plan of having the heat kick on only if things dip below 50 is a massive FAIL because the temperature will never drop below 50. Seems like a poor design for anyone out there who sees heat as a wasted resource, one not worth splurging for if my comfort is the only one to be concerned within the place.

I cranked it up to 65 and went to take a shower. As soon as I got out I put on a shirt and an Illinois fleece I have. I was walking around finding the rest of my clothing to wear today with my cock rubbing against the inside of my fleece, which hung lower than my shirt. It was just weird. Luckily, the place was still too cold to arouse me.